Once there was a Dutchman
His name was Johnny Rebeck
He made the finest sausages and sauerkraut and speck
He made the finest sausages that’ll evermore be seen
Till one day he invented a sausage makin’ machine
Oh, Mr. Johnny Rebeck how could you be so mean
I told you, you’d be sorry for inventin’ that machine
Now all the neighbors cats and dogs will nevermore be seen
They’ll all be ground to sausages in Johnny Rebeck’s machine
One day a young boy came walkin’ thru the door
He bought a pound of sausages and laid them on the floor
He started to a’whistle and he whistled up a tune
And all the little sausages went dancin’ round the room
Oh, Mr. Johnny Rebeck how could you be so mean
I told you, you’d be sorry for inventin’ that machine
Now all the neighbors cats and dogs will nevermore be seen
They’ll all be ground to sausages in Johnny Rebeck’s machine
Oh, Mr. Johnny Rebeck how could you be so mean
I told you, you’d be sorry for inventin’ that machine
Now all the neighbors cats and dogs will nevermore be seen
They’ll all be ground to sausages in Johnny Rebeck’s machine
One day the meat inspector came knockin’ at the door
He said “I’ll start a lookin or give me money more”
Well Johnny got real angry and pushed him in the meat
He fired up the old machine an now there’s more to eat
Oh, Mr. Johnny Rebeck how could you be so mean
I told you, you’d be sorry for inventin’ that machine
Now all the neighbors cats and dogs will nevermore be seen
They’ll all be ground to sausages in Johnny Rebeck’s machine
One day there was a shortage there was no meat ta grind
So Johnny he called up the pound ta see what he could find
They said were outta business we keep the strays no more
But we’ll send all our future finds directly to your door
Oh, Mr. Johnny Rebeck how could you be so mean
I told you, you’d be sorry for inventin’ that machine
Now all the neighbors cats and dogs will nevermore be seen
They’ll all be ground to sausages in Johnny Rebeck’s machine
One day the machine wouldn’t work, the darn thing wouldn’t go
So Johnny climbed inside to see what made it so
His wife she had a nightmare, she was walkin’ in her sleep
She gave the crank an awful yank and Johnny Rebeck was meat
Oh, Mr. Johnny Rebeck how could you be so mean
I told you, you’d be sorry for inventin’ that machine
Now all the neighbors cats and dogs will nevermore be seen
They’ll all be ground to sausages in Johnny Rebeck’s machine
Traditional
Johnny Rebeck – Renaissance Fair Version
